Life is messy, and that's okay.
Go ahead, say it out loud. Now say it again like you're at least attempting to mean it. Now close your eyes, inhale deeeeeply, breathe out sloooowly, and say it a third time. How did that feel? When I say it, my brain immediately hits me with a billion comebacks. Somewhere in the area of 'hell no, it's not ok' and 'you're crazy'. But, after a losing battle with perfection that had me stuck in "same self-beat-up different day" when it came to my goals, I decided to consider what life might feel like if I embraced this foreign and very uncomfortable concept.
It means I'm not any less if the house is messy, because I can clean it this weekend. I'm not a failure if I bomb my first interview, because I'll improve. I'm not doomed because I haven't hit six figures since starting my business 4 years ago, because everyone starts somewhere. I'm not a lost cause if I haven't found the love of my life yet, or a sucky mom if... and so on and so on. Yup, start contemplating the idea of embracing the mess, and things get really real - real quick.
You might end up face to face with all the things about yourself, your relationships, and your life you've been holding to an unreachable standard of perfection. That word again; holding us hostage to some version of who we should be and causing us to devalue who we are. Perfection is the greatest trick of all because it doesn't exist, and if we continue to seek it...well, hamster wheel anyone?
The only sane solution is acceptance - releasing our attachment to what it's "supposed to look like" and being grateful for what is while working on being our best selves. (Sorry, the growing doesn't get to stop.)
Sure it's a challenge, but it's worth the two incredible things that happen when we take our energy away from the guilt, shame, and stress we feel when things don't look the way we think they should:
- We enjoy what we have.
We focus on what we want to create.
Acceptance is a light in the dark, helping us find order in the chaos and mental space to plan our next big move. Now say it again until it really starts to ring true - because it is.